Written July of 2008

am the single mother of 16 year old twin daughters. The children have lived with me for the greater part of their lives, three years ago their father convinced them to move in with him (promises of cell phones and body piercing and other things that I was to “uptight” to permit at the time.) So, I started sending him a check on a weekly basis, (on my own – no one had to ask me) he (their father) even took me to court to see if he could get more money and the court entered an order for the amount I was sending him already and it was decided that since I had been mailing him a check every week it would be left alone and there would be no wage withholding – I would just continue to mail him a check. I would also like to point out that when these girls were 2 years old he took me to court (Middletown) and wanted to terminate his parental rights so he wouldn’t have to pay child support. They (the girls) have since returned to my home where I have taken care of them on my own for the past two years, their father has done nothing to support them as was the case for a better part of their lives. I do the best I can, I pay for their medical insurance, co pays, medicine and borrow money from my mother to keep them alive.

Today I went into the Middletown Court to file a motion to modify child support; I had to make the very painful decision to pay a $70.00 fee and take their father to court or to have money to feed them for the rest of the week. We will be eating pancakes this week – a decision I feel no parent should have to make. On paper I must look pretty good because it was determined that I made to much money to waive that fee and the Sheriff’s fee – tell that to my children who ask me for things and my response has to be I’m sorry I don’t have the money.

I find it impossible to believe that I – the person taking care of these two girls on my own has to take time off from work (this took money away from my children) I then have to pay a fee to file paper work (more money from my children- lets not forget the fact that I had to pay to make copies of the paperwork for the court) then I will have to pay a Sheriff to serve their father (more money gone) then take another day off from work to go to court just to get child support for a few months – because their father does seasonal work and will get laid off from his job and I will be right back where I started – where is the justice for these children.

Something really needs to be done so that other people don’t go through this – I work with a woman who hasn’t taken her ex husband to court because she can’t afford to pay the fees and take time off from work – how does this happen? Something needs to done so the children who deserve to be taken care of are, and so that deadbeat parents who are not living up to their responsibilities are held accountable. Without taking more money from the children that need it.

I think their father should have to reimburse me for the fee’s and time lost from work – maybe then he will take his responsibilities a little more seriously.

Maybe I am just venting and I need someone to hear me but as I write this tears are streaming down my face because I know that because I had to make this decision today and pay this money and take time from work my children are the ones who will suffer.

Sincerely

Ines Stack